Did you know that? I just found out. I learned it this year. I also learned that China violates most basic human rights set up by the UN. And that water in Steamboat is tolerable, but the rest is just gross.
After six months in Spain and lots of Skype dates, emails, messages and melt downs, this is what I somehow pieced together and need to not forget:
1. It is a good thing to have standards in life and to stick to them. For example: a car, a job, and a savings account are necessary for boyfriends. And a wage above $8.50 an hour is necessary for a job. And a smile is necessary to getting things done in stressful situations.
2. If you rinse your fingers with cold water immediately after cutting up an onion, they won't smell like onion for ever and ever.
3. In order to bake a potato, you need to stab it with a fork a few times.
4. Needles really don't hurt that bad if you breathe and don't think about somethings strange going in your skin.
5. There are worse things in life than paper cuts, break ups, hangovers, and breaking one nail when all the other ones are perfectly long and great.
6. Rest and regret is a good policy for after a slightly humiliating night. But limit it to one day of resting and regretting, then move on.
7. Never, never, never chug Guinness. No matter how many free leprechaun hats are being offered.
8. Don't say yes to every question you get asked; sometimes you need time to think and say no. Or think and say yes. But thinking is vital.
9. Not all stories need to be told. If you can leave them in the past, sometimes that is where they belong.
10. Standing up for yourself is a good thing. That way crazy girls you are forced to live with don't make you miserably, boys don't treat you like they thought you were a real cool snag at a garage sale but then decided to toss in the dumpster on their way home, and your professors will take a second look at that paper they didn't grade fairly.
11. Always get the shitty stuff done first: like calc. Why did I put it off until now? Really Michelle? Was senior year that much more fun without it? NO.
12. If a pipe is leaking in your brain and lots of green stuff is flowing out of you like Niagara Falls... go to the doctor.
13. If I have to pick between weighing 110 pounds or eating cookies and ice cream... I'll take the ice cream.
14. If I have to pick between going to the gym and going outside, outside is better. God created the world and frankly, if he thought treadmills were a productive way to spend my life, he'd have stuck on in the Garden of Eden. And I haven't heard a thing about Eve running her booty off on a treadmill. So no thank you.
15. Sometimes, people just are not going to like you. And that is okay.
16. And sometimes people are going to make stuff up to cover up their own problems, and that is okay too. Because as long as you know who you are, the rest of those rumors and lies don't really matter at the end of the day.
17. Seeley Booth is the most perfect fictional character ever and if it was possible, I would marry him. That was a big lesson because it bumped Mark Darcy to second place. Ouch, Darcy, did it hurt when you fell?
18. Always drink three glasses of water before bed if drinking has occured.
19. Do one thing a day that makes you truly happy. Taking care of yourself and your heart is vital if you plan on taking care of anyone else.
20. Proof read everything.
21. Think before you write. And sometimes, just don't write at all. Or talk for that matter.
22. Always put your dishes in the dish washer.
23. Laundry is stupid. It was 10 years ago, it is now, and it will always be. But it is also kind of therapeutic and so do it and don't wait till you only have one pair of undies left. EW.
24. Keep in touch with old friends.
25. Be alone. It is good for the heart and good for growth. But at the same time, don't force it. Leaning on friends is a good thing, which I learned this year.
26. Okay so this one I learned recently and haven't implimented: but set goal. Stop being a baby about it and decide what needs to happen.
27. Always say sorry first.
28. Even if you want to junk punch someone and tell them where they can put it: be graceful. Nobody really likes someone who goes around smashing egos openly. If you have to do so, try and be kind about it.
29. STOP DRINKING STARBUCKS EVERY SINGLE DAY.
30. Budget, budget, budget.
31. But don't miss things that are awesome cause you are on a budget. Sometimes you have to go to France.
32. If you have to wake up really early, trust your alarm. So that you don't spend all night waking up repeatedly to check the time.
33. Wait for someone who knows you. Really knows you. And take things slow. And don't be closed off to love. But most importantly: be with someone who makes you laugh. That is the key.
34. Laugh at yourself daily.
35. Drink water. Even though it tastes horrible and boring.
36. Mom is always right. Doesn't that just suck?
37. If Dad says no to a guy, listen. Otherwise you'll hear about it for EVER when it falls apart.
38. Put your name in all your books. But always share them.
39. Stop reading the same books over and over.
40. Try new things. Like bananas. Or basketball.
41. Always hold babies when you get the chance or babysit, that way you won't want to have one of your own.
42. It's okay sometimes to just let people be nice to you for no reason without feeling bad.
43. Tony on Ab Ripper would be ashamed of me, but on the weeks I get motivated, he is a god. So this year I learned that on fat days... ab ripper is a bff. So is spandex under your jeans. I think spandex counts as a workout plan.
44. It's okay to secretly be furious when your friend buys the sweater you wanted, when your sister gets better grades than you, or your ex isn't miserable without you. As a girl, it is kind of given that you are allowed to be secretly furious about these things. As long as you keep it relatively secret.
45. When drunk, it is not a good idea to be let near Facebook, Skype, or a phone. Or black football players.
46. Watching shows that stress you out or make you feel like you are going to get stabbed are not healthy.
47. Cooking is a fun. Baking is not.
48. Quotable cards are great if you need a status that nobody has used yet.
49. Traveling is the best way to learn.
50. Never wear heels unless the night requires no more walking than from a car to a chair.
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